This Blog Has Moved

Hi everyone - I have successfully migrated my blog to its new home at Wordpress - please bookmark the new site:

www.shrinkingjill.com

The blogspot address will still be active for awhile, but I won't be posting anything new here - it's all going to the new site.  Check it out!

The Beck Diet Newsletter

Still on the road!  My team and I are staying at this amazing hotel on the lower coast of New Hampshire - normally my employer wouldn't pay for resort-style accomodations but because this isn't tourist season in New England the rates are dirt cheap - so we are travelling in style this week!  Had a great walk yesterday morning before work, enjoying the cool ocean air and looking at all the gorgeous flowers popping up.  Last night's dinner was, unfortunately, too much food.  Sigh.  I felt icky this morning when I got up. 

When I checked my email last night I found the latest Beck Diet Newsletter.  It's almost like they knew I was on the road and needed some inspiration!  I can't say enough good things about this book - when every other diet book on the planet is telling you that you can eat what you want and still lose weight (yeah, right), the Beck Diet tells it straight and provides real tools to help change long-standing habits and behaviors.  I hope you get as much out of the latest newsletter as I did!  Check it out HERE.

FRUSTRATED!

This weekend I decided to switch to a Wordpress blog, and use a hosting service to allow me more freedom to customize.  Unfortunately I am way undereducated on webhosting and transferring domain names!  Although I've been researching how to make this happen without too much stress I've been unsuccessful.  Many apologies if you've tried to reach my blog and gotten a 404 page (or if this happens over the next few days)!  Hopefully by next weekend I'll be up and running properly on Wordpress...

In other news I am traveling this week on business - have resolved to eat well and exercise - so far so good!  No Wednesday weigh-in this week, though.  But I promise to weigh in next Wednesday and post some progress pics!

Goal Shirt

For the past few months I've been trolling through my bins of too-small clothes, trying to find a goal outfit - something that I really look forward to wearing after I've lost more weight.  I have lots of cute clothes all the way down to size 10 and briefly considered a pair of Jordache jeans from high school, but then I found a t-shirt that I bought in 1995 when I weighed 162 pounds (for about 5 minutes).  The front looks like this:

Cute, right?  Well, the best part of the shirt is the back - a play on the Nike slogan 'Run Like Hell':

Once I found this shirt, my search for a goal outfit was over. 

Out & Back Party Run!

The Out and Back Party Run for ALS was a BLAST!  Our friends, Elizabeth and Doug, rocked the 4-mile run, with Doug setting a PR for himself!  Woohoo!  Ken was kind enough to accompany me on the 2-mile walk, which I treated as an interval run.  My hip was feeling good and I managed nine minutes of jogging (spread out over five intervals).  It felt great to be running in a group, at sunset, with Boathouse Row as a backdrop.  After the run we headed over to the fabulous Lemon Hill Mansion for the par-tay.  There was great beer, lots of food and a rockin band, along with about 1500 people.  Definitely a fun time and I plan to sign up for next year's run.  However, next year I will do the 4-mile run and I'd like to finish in under 40 minutes.

Sadly, when I woke up on Saturday morning my hip was on FIRE.  It feels better today, but I definitely overdid it on Friday night and have decided to give in and call a doctor, in hopes that she can tell me what the problem is and give me some suggestions.  Stretching and rest just doesn't seem to be working and it's very hard to ice that area since it's, um, well-padded.

Today I was planning to ride my bike to the pool, but it is raining cats and dogs so I'll just drive to the pool instead.  I'm aiming for a 1500-yard swim today!

Back in the Game?

After a 2-week hiatus, I hopped on the treadmill this morning to try out my new running shoes and see how my hip, knee and ankle would hold up.  Although there was a bit of moaning from my various joints everything held up pretty well!  I made it through a few tentative intervals and decided that I LOVE LOVE LOVE my new Brooks Adrenaline GTS10 running shoes!  I purchased them at Fleet Feet a couple weeks back.  Fleet Feet is an amazing store - especially the staff.  After asking me some questions about my running style and any issues I was having (of course I had a long list) they spent a good half-hour helping me find the perfect shoes.  They measured each foot (both sitting and standing), watched me walk barefoot, and brought several different options to try.  They even let me run outside in each pair to see how they felt!  Then they hooked me up with some inserts to help support my high instep and absorb impact when I run.  The shoes felt great this morning - very springy and supportive.  Yay!

Tomorrow Ken and I are participating in an out-and-back party run for ALS in downtown Philly with some friends.  I actually signed us up for the walking portion (only 2 miles) because I wasn't sure if I'd be able to run at all.  My plan is to run some intervals and see how things feel on pavement before I make my final assessment of how well my injuries have healed.  But I have high hopes.

After the run there's a party in the park with good food and beer - can't wait for that!

Wednesday Weigh In!

Wow.  The scale read 236.2 this morning - a 1.2 pound drop from last week.  I don't know how it happened, but I will gratefully accept it!

This week's loss brings me past the 25-pound mark, woohoo!

There's guilt, and then there's GUILT

For those of you that say unspeakable things to yourself after you've strayed from your eating/exercise/whatever plan - read this, and cut yourself some slack: http://www.sparkpeople.com/resource/wellness_articles.asp?id=692

Back in Control

Ahhhh - after yet another day of eating with reckless abandon (dinner out last night easily exceeded 2000 calories, possibly more, including 4 glasses of wine) - I am back in control today and feeling more like myself. 

Breakfast this morning consisted of whole grain bread with almond butter, and a cup of coffee with non-fat milk.  This is the breakfast that has carried me through the past few months and seems to be the fuel that gets my day started off right.  No more sugary breakfasts for me!  Half of a mango made up my morning snack, followed by a lunch of tuna salad on whole grain bread, a cup of brussels sprouts and cauliflower, a cup of raspberries and a small piece of a Lindor chocolate bar for dessert.  Dinner was a yummy sandwich of french bread, fresh mozzarella, sliced tomatoes, lettuce, pesto and one slice of bacon.  A scant quarter cup of vanilla ice cream with a tablespoon of chocolate sauce for dessert along with a handful of walnuts for crunch.  A nice well-balanced day including some treats and lots of good food.  Can't even begin to tell you how much less toxic I feel today!

Lost a battle - but not the war

Last weekend I was feeling pretty smug.  So smug, in fact, that I had a blog post half-written in my head describing how I'd finally conquered my food demons and adopted a healthy lifestyle.  How I had made this lifestyle a habit, and that I couldn't picture going back to binging and watching TV every night.  How I was no longer addicted to sugar.

Yeah, right.

On Wednesday I received a package at work - a stack of documents from a coworker in the UK - and she put at least five pounds of chocolate in the package as a thank-you.  Five pounds of British chocolate - several varieties of Cadbury, to be exact.   The package came at the end of the day Wednesday and I ate about 200 calories worth.  Yum!  Then I rode my bike to Rena's and did my usual training & yoga session and rode home.  No problem, right?

Unfortunately the chocolate was still there on Thursday.  And I didn't bother packing food before work because we were having a group pizza lunch.  So off I went to work, empty stomach, nothing healthy on the horizon.  I stopped at Starbucks for my coffee and thought "oh, I need breakfast - I'll just treat myself to a package of Madeleines."  That was my first mistake - it's been months since I started my morning with a sugary breakfast and I think that has been key to my success so far!  When I got to work and saw the pile of chocolate, everything just fell apart.  The pull of the sugar was reignited within me and I couldn't stop nibbling.  Three pieces of pizza, two garlic knots and two brownies at lunch...pizza for dinner...now it is Sunday morning and I've been in a free-fall of pizza, sugar, salt & fat for three days.  And I haven't exercised once during that time. 

I'm not really worried about getting myself back on track - I feel so crappy, tired, sluggish, sick and foggy right now that I'm actually craving fruits and vegetables.  But I learned an important lesson this week - the time when you think you've conquered a problem is the precise time you need to be most vigilant!  I stopped paying attention to my fledgling healthy habits and they weren't strong enough to survive on their own.  I have been humbled yet again on this journey.

PS - On Friday I turned the chocolate over to a coworker with a much stronger constitution.  And an office with a door that locks.

Good News/Bad News

The good news is...my hip feels a lot better after a week of not running.  And last night I rode my bike to and from Rena's studio, where I did a 45 minute workout with weights followed by an hour of yoga - 2.5 hours of exercise in one shot! 

After I came home I puttered around the house, took a shower and went to bed.  During this time I noticed a twinge on the outside of my left knee.  Hmmm. Fast forward to the middle of the night, when I got up to pee....bigger twinge.  Borderline pain.  This morning?  Not good.  I'm writing this now with an ice pack wrapped around it after taking 3 ibuprofen.

Here we go again!

Wednesday Weigh In!

Very happy with the scale this morning - 237.4!  That's a pound down from last week and after two meals out last week I couldn't be happier!

No time to write more now, have to leave for work in five minutes.  Have a great Wednesday!

Awesome Training Ride!

Such a great training ride today - 11 miles in 55 minutes, a vast improvement over last week's ride.  I was pretty pleased, as this is only my second ride outside this year and really my first outdoor training ride because last week was more experimental than anything else.  I attribute the improvement to having fully inflated tires and using my cycling shoes with clipless pedals instead of my usual sneakers.  The shoes really make a difference, especially when going uphill - I get more power out of each stroke.  Riding outdoors is also less abusive to my butt - my bike seat is nice and soft, and my bike has good shocks so I don't feel the bumps.  Far preferable to the pain after spin class!

After today's ride I'm starting to think of goal times for the SheRox Tri in August - previously I was just hoping to finish but now I'm hoping for more - I want to not finish last!   

I looked up race times for my age group from previous years, and it looks like finish times range from 1.5-3 hours.  I'd be OVERJOYED with a finish time of 2.5 hours.  I think this is possible - if I do the swim in 25 minutes, the bike in 75 and the run in 40, plus 5 minutes each for T1 and T2 (since this is my first tri I'm assuming I'll be a total spaz in transition) that's a total of 2.5 hours.  Right now I can swim 900 yards in the pool in 25, and today's ride time was a 12 mph pace, which puts me at 75 min.  At this point I could probably manage 45 minutes for the 5K so I definitely need some work there.  And of course I need to account for being tired after each leg of the race!  But that's what training is for, right?

After a calorie-heavy lunch of whole wheat rotini, pesto, pine nuts and freshly grated Parmigiano Reggiano cheese, I'm off to do some yard work to burn off some energy.  Today Ken and I are assembling our compost bins, cutting the lawn, cleaning up the yard and planning out the garden.  Hoping to grill some buffalo burgers later today, YUM!

Post-Workout Update

I guess there's a silver lining to my hip issues, because it means I'm spending more time in the pool.  This morning I swam really well - covered 1100 yards in....wait for it...less time than it took me to swim 1000 yards on Tuesday!  Woohoo!

And here's another exciting bit of news - this week I noticed that my bathing suit is getting too big.  TOO BIG!  TOO FREAKING BIG!  Life is good :)

Injuries, Injuries, Injuries

Since I started working out regularly last summer, I have managed to accumulate a lot of aches, pains and flat-out injuries along the way.  It all started with training for the Breast Cancer 3-Day - after my walks reached the 10-mile mark my right calf would cramp up and cause a LOT of pain.  Sometimes I could walk through it, sometimes I was just done.  I tried ice, rest, elevation, ibuprofen...but since I needed to keep training I would only take a week off at a time and never fully recovered - I just ended up learning to live with it.  Of course, as soon as the training was over I gave it a proper rest and it healed with no problems!

Then came the Achilles pain - I developed stiffness in my right Achilles and a tender knot just above my heel.  This injury never became unbearably painful, but it was always worse after sitting or lying down for awhile and I worried about the lump.  Rest, ice, elevation, ibuprofen, stretching...no real improvement.  So off to the orthopedist I went, returning with a diagnosis of Achilles Tendinosis and instructions for some exercises to help strengthen my calf.  The area is definitely on the mend now.

There have been lots of other aches and pains along the way, most of which flare up and then disappear, but for the past week my right hip has been bothering me a lot.  It's fine when I'm sitting or lying down, but as soon as I stand up there is stiffness and soreness between the joint and my pelvic bone, right on the side of my body.  It subsides a bit after I walk around, but I did a treadmill run on Thursday morning and by the end of my workout I was in pain and starting to limp.

I'm inclined to think that the root cause of these injuries is my extra weight, but I'm also seeing a pattern - everything is on my right side and it seems to be moving up my leg.  Could it possibly be related to with the way I walk or run - maybe something I'm doing to compensate for having extra weight to move around, or perhaps I'm compensating for pain elsewhere and throwing my gait off?  Today I'm going to pick up some new running shoes, in case that's the problem (my old ones are starting to wear out anyway).  I've also decided to take a full week off from my Couch-to-5K program and focus on non-weight-bearing cardio to see if that helps.

I've been so dedicated to my workouts and have been careful not to add running mileage too quickly, so it's REALLY frustrating to have this happen!  Of course I've got alternate cardio options and I'm working out with weights and doing yoga, but running is a really efficient way to burn calories so I'm anxious to put this latest setback behind me and move on.  Since I can't change my weight overnight I guess I'll just have to keep working around my limitations.  So it's off to the pool this morning to swim another 1000 yards.

Has anyone else out there encountered hip pain like this, or suffered from a string of injuries?

Wednesday Weigh In

It's a happy morning here in Shrinking Jill's house, because I hit a new low this week!

238.4!!!!

Woohoo!  That's a 2.2 loss from last week.  I'm very pleased :)

This morning, however, I can't seem to find a pair of spring pants (it's going to be 90 today!).  I have bins and bins of smaller clothes all over the house and I know they are somewhere in one of those bins...but alas I have to leave for work in 15 minutes and it doesn't look good.  I'll write more later, but in the meantime I'm going to look for something to wear!

Update 4:38 pm - I found the pants I was looking for and even had time to iron them before I left for work - yippee!!!  When I got to work I opened a new jar of almond butter (the natural kind with a layer of oil on top) and spilled it all over my freshly ironed pants - BOOOOOO!!!!!

Oh well.  They were really too big for me anyway!

Fun in the Deep End

After 3 days of heavy cardio plus a great strength training workout I decided to give myself (well mostly my right hip) a break and go for a swim tonight.  There is a really nice pool about 3 miles from my house and they have about 10 lanes dedicated to lap swimming plus a sweeeeeet aquatic play area with slides and waterspouts.  I stopped off on the way home from work and surprised myself by swimming 1000 yards in less than 30 minutes!  Woohoo!

The pool is uber-nice - very clean, not over-chlorinated, nice cool temperature (I absolutely hate lap swimming in bath water) with wide lanes and lifeguards that appear to be actually watching people swim instead of reading books.  Most of the pool is at least 10 feet deep but there's a little ledge that runs around the edge about 4 feet down so you don't have to tread water when you're taking a break.  There are lots of windows so it *almost* feels like you're swimming outside.  The locker room was huge, clean and had a scale that looked like something out of The Biggest Loser (someday I'll post a picture, this thing could weigh farm animals).  Best of all, at 5pm there weren't too many people there so I had a whole lane all to myself!  This is a true luxury - I usually swim at LA Fitness where they only have 4 skinny lanes and I always seem to get stuck sharing with someone who flails about like they're drowning.  One time I got kicked in the head.  But I digress.

Anyway, 1000 yards is the farthest I've swum (swam?) since I was on the swim team in 9th grade and had to do a 2 mile (3600 yard) swim for charity (I puked afterwards).  I guess you could say I'm feeling pretty good about myself right now!

Bed of Nails?

I came across a cool blog this evening: The Everything Yoga Blog.  And the second post I read reviewed a yantra mat.  Apparently this mat is not for asanas, but rather for lying on and relaxing.  I've seen photos of these mats in Yoga Journal but this is the first time I've ever read a review.  I'm intrigued!  Has anyone else out there tried one of these mats?  What was your experience?

And speaking of yoga, there's a 2-hour special on PBS this Wednesday (April 7th) about the life of Buddha, narrated by Richard Gere.  Click here for more information and local listings.  I can't wait to watch this - already set my DVR!

Off to a Good Start

Today is off to a good start - I got up early and hit the treadmill, showered, and then packed a yummy breakfast and morning snack (2 slices of whole grain bread, almond butter and a mango).  Lunch will be sushi and a salad at Whole Foods, YUM!  After work I have a training session with Rena.  In order to get in all the workouts for my triathlon training schedule as well as keep up with my strength training and yoga (and have a social life!) Mondays have now become a double workout day so I can take Friday off.  I've been doing it for a couple weeks and it really gets the week off on the right foot.  Tomorrow night I'll swim to give my legs a break - there's a really nice pool at the local community center that I've been itching to check out. 

Don't have much else to say today, so I'll leave you with a link to a great website I found this weekend - the Stand Up and Eat blog from the Cooper Institute. 

Outdoor Ride!

This morning I decided to get my bike out and ride on the Schuylkill River Trail instead of doing spin class.  Last weekend Ken got my bike tuned up and ready to go, so I took advantage of the good weather and drove to Conshohocken to start my ride.

When I got to the trail head I realized my tires were a little on the flat side.  Since I didn't have a pump with me I just rode slowly and enjoyed the scenery.  It felt great to be outside and getting some exercise for the second day in a row - the fresh air and sunshine were amazing!  I ended up doing about 8 miles in 40 minutes, which is a little over half the distance of the SheRox Triathlon.  The ride back was a bit tougher than the ride out - I didn't think to check the direction of the wind and it was a bit gusty on the return trip.  But there were lots of other people on the trail, the sun was shining and the temperature was in the mid-60's.  A completely and utterly perfect day!  After a quick lunch of tortellini with pesto and a mango for dessert, I'm off to give my dirty car a full-on spring cleaning and then plant some summer bulbs.  Happy Easter everyone!

Cubital Tunnel Syndrome

For the past few years I have occasionally woken up in the middle of the night with a numb left hand.  The first couple times this happened I panicked, thinking it was a sign of a heart attack.  After awhile, however, it became apparent that it was most likely tied to my sleeping position and I kind of assumed it was due to being overweight - I'm a side sleeper and figured that lying on my left side must be cutting off the circulation.  But about a year ago, I noticed that sometimes my left hand would go numb even though I was lying on my RIGHT side.  I did some googling and found that other people have the same problem, and it is often due to sleeping with elbows bent - which is without a doubt my favorite sleeping position.  Unfortunately, even though I make an effort to fall sleep with my arms straight, I occasionally wake up with my arms bent and my hands curled under my pillow. 

The numbness is usually limited to my pinky and ring finger, but last night I slept so well on my new mattress that I must have stayed in the same position for a few hours - I woke up to an arm that was numb almost to the elbow!  It took awhile to come back to life and I started to worry that I might be causing permanent nerve damage.  So I googled again and came across a lot of useful information - it turns out that this condition has a name and lots of treatments options.

Cubital tunnel syndrome (also called ulnar tunnel syndrome) occurs when there is pressure on the ulnar nerve, which runs from the spinal cord through the elbow and into the hand.  When the elbow is bent, the nerve can be stretched against the bones in that area of the arm and cause a variety of symptoms.  The syndrome is common in people who sleep with their elbows bent, or who have a tendency to lean on their elbows a lot (also something I do).  Over time, weakness, pain, numbness and ultimately nerve damage can occur.  It seems to me that I have a bit less feeling/strength in my left pinky than my right (which might also be my imagination) but other than that I don't seem to have any permanent damage.  The website I found lists a few treatments, surgery being one of them, but the easiest and cheapest seems to be 'splinting' the arm with a towel at night for a few weeks to retrain yourself to sleep with straight elbows. That's what I'll try first.

Every time something doesn't feel right in my body I'm inclined to assume the worst (and also blame it on myself for being overweight).  My parents have had cancer, diabetes, heart disease and ALS, and I sometimes feel like it's just a matter of time before one of those conditions comes my way - that even though I'm working so hard on my health now, the damage is done and a devastating illness is inevitable.  It was a relief to discover that CTS is a common syndrome that is relatively harmless and easy to treat.  

I'm off now for my Saturday run - the weather is so amazing today that I'm going to hit up a local trail instead of the treadmill!

Wednesday Weigh In and Bed Update

My first Wednesday Weigh In is here!  Today's weight is.....drum roll please.........................

240.6!

Sigh.  After bouncing around in the 239's for several days, the scale decided to hop up today.  Oh well, I know it is probably related to the high sodium foods I've snacked on over the past few days.  I'm hoping the scale will read 238 next Wednesday!

As for the bed, well, all I can say is...I'm IN LOVE with this thing!  I'll be honest, the first night was a little rough.  The mattress was pretty stiff, not at all like the floor model that we tried at the store.  The salesman told us it might take a few days to break it in and suggested we walk around on it after it arrived, which I did, but apparently it wasn't enough because I tossed and turned all night and woke up with a worse backache than I had the day before!  On day 2, I walked around on it some more before bed and slept better, and last night I did the same.  This morning I woke up well rested and pain free after 7 hours of blissful, comfortable sleep.  Ahhhhh. 

Yay for memory foam!

Adding Structure

For the past couple months I've been letting my body guide my hunger and haven't really counted calories too closely - I sort of mentally note what I've eaten and try to keep it below 2000 calories.  Much to my surprise, this approach has been quite successful!  Slowly but surely I've lost weight and for the most part I've felt pretty satisfied.  But the weight loss has been slow and I'm anxious to get into the next size down. 

A few weeks ago I decided to step up my workouts - with the triathlon approaching I don't have a moment to spare in my training.  Today I decided it was time to start formalizing my weight loss strategy as well - it could take me a couple years to get to my goal weight at this rate, and I'd like to make this triathlon as easy on myself as possible.  I'm not expecting to lose 50 pounds in 4 months, but it would be nice to take off at least 25-30. 

Starting tomorrow I'm going to start tracking my calories using Daily Plate on Livestrong.com.  I've used this website in the past and found that it's a fantastic tool for keeping track of calories, nutrients, weight and activity.  And it's FREE!  Rather than ball-parking about 2000 calories per day I'll count more closely and aim for about 1500-1800 depending on how much exercise I've gotten that day. Daily Plate gives you a daily target based on your current weight, goal weight, and time to goal.  You record your weight and as you lose weight your daily target goes down - but you get to eat more when you record your exercise!

I'll also start formalizing my weigh-ins.  Right now I weigh myself almost every day.  I know they say you're not supposed to do that, but it honestly works for me - I look forward to getting on the scale each morning and don't get discouraged if there's not a lot of downward movement.  However, I don't track my overall change in weight other than change against my starting point last October - and thus I don't have a good idea of how much I lose each week, and how my weight cycling relates to daily calorie intake and general nutrition.  So I've decided to 'officially' weigh in on Wednesdays and I'll post the updates here.

Check back this Wednesday for my first official weigh-in and a report on my first few nights with the Tempurpedic bed.

New Bed!

For years, I have suffered from upper-backaches and I usually don't sleep through the night without waking up a few times.  I've always chalked it up to having a large chest and a genetic predisposition to being a light sleeper (my mom frequently got up in the middle of the night to read because she couldn't sleep) (she also had big boobs) (that was probably TMI).  My tossing and turning isn't insomnia - I'll wake up, change position, and go right back to sleep.  Often I'm woken up because my left hand has gone numb from sleeping on it the wrong way, so I wait a few minutes til the feeling has come back and then go right back to sleep. 

A couple weeks ago I stayed at a Novotel in the UK.  Although this is a budget hotel chain, every room had a Tempurpedic mattress, and I had the best night's sleep I've had in years!  No tossing and turning and I woke up only once during the night.  My hand never went numb and my whole body felt great when I got up in the morning.  And all this in a hotel room - I never sleep well in hotels!  When I got home to my own bed (which is nice and fluffy and really quite comfortable, mind you) the backache came back and I had a hard time sleeping through the night again.

Yesterday I decided enough was enough.  We ordered a Tempurpedic mattress yesterday and it comes today!  I can't wait to try it out - the salesman warned us that it might take a couple nights to get used to, but both of us found the floor model really comfortable so I think we'll be OK.  I'll report back in a couple days with the results. 

What I Learned on the Yoga Mat Tonight

I, like many people, have a fear of failure.  The fear can be about something big (I'm afraid to change careers because I might not be good at something else) or small (I'm afraid to try hip hop dancing because I'll look silly), but either way the basic feeling is the same:  I don't think I can do it.  It might hurt.  It might be hard.  I might fail.  I might, I might, I might.  There are so many things in my life that I haven't done because I was afraid of failing.

Tonight I asked Rena to lead me through a new yoga pose, side plank.  I've seen pictures of people doing the pose, and have thought about it a number of times but have always been afraid it would be too hard for me.  And believe it or not, I've never even tried it on my own, in the privacy of my home!  That fear of failure kept me from trying.  I'm not just afraid to fail in public, I'm afraid to fail even when nobody else will know!  In my mind, I had built something as simple as a new yoga pose into something so difficult that I would need to wait until I was much fitter to even attempt it.

But tonight I thought I'd just ask, and maybe I could make a feeble attempt and see how much I could do.  Rena talked me through it slowly -first regular plank...then side plank on one knee...and when the time came to move my bottom leg I was afraid that I wouldn't be able to do it.  I was really tired, my legs were shaking, and I just didn't think I could do it.  It was such a small movement - just slide my bottom leg straight and balance...I hesitated for a long moment and then a voice inside me said STOP WORRYING AND JUST DO IT!  I moved my leg out, and held a perfect side plank pose for several seconds.  And then repeated it on the other side.

This experience may seem trivial to some, but I honestly had an epiphany right there on the mat.  How many times have I hesitated in life because I was afraid to take a small step forward?  Because I thought it would hurt?  Because I thought it would be difficult physically, mentally or emotionally?  Because it was outside my comfort zone?  Because I was afraid to fail?  In that moment I saw everything that has held me back in life...and all the possibilities that lie ahead of me.  I realized that failure doesn't define me, in fact it makes me stronger.  By playing it safe, I'm missing out.  Who cares if I try something new and it doesn't work?  Does it make me less of a person?  Nope.  Just the opposite.  And the rewards of success are so much sweeter when you take a chance.  I felt so great about myself tonight for executing that pose - yes, it made me feel a bit silly for not having tried it before since I was obviously capable of handling it.  But it gave me the confidence to stop worrying about what will happen and take more chances with myself.

The yoga mat is a magical place - you never know what you'll find there.  In Rena's words, the mat is the place where you can lose yourself and find yourself and I'd have to agree!  I know I found something in myself tonight that I'll treasure for a long time - the willingness to fail.

Starbucks Pastry, Free Pizza and Smaller Clothes

Today started out well - another half pound down on the scale, bringing me to a total of 23 pounds in 21 weeks.  A pair of pants that was a bit tight on me a few weeks ago zipped up with no problem today.  And best of all, I successfully navigated the FREE PASTRIES at Starbucks this morning.  Yes - that's correct - they were giving away free pastries.  Pound cake, croissants, donuts - you name it, they tried to give me some this morning.  I said no a couple times, came close to caving in, and then ultimately walked away. 

And then I got to work.  Stress stress stress from the moment my butt hit my chair at 6:15 am.  By 10:30 I had eaten my morning snacks plus my lunch, and was under no illusions that it was anything other than stress eating.  By noon I had scarfed down a piece of pizza from the cafeteria and two cookies.  More stress.  At 3:30 I wandered past some cold pizza and scooped up two slices.  Fully aware that I was coping with food, I ate both slices in less than 5 minutes. 

Stress eating is something I've avoided pretty well over the past few months.  But today I reached a pretty high frustration level and I needed to diffuse my stress quickly - and food has NEVER let me down when it comes to that.  So while it might not have been the most constructive way to deal with things, today I made a conscious choice to use it to calm myself down enough to function. 

There was one major difference between today's stress eating and past experiences - normally if I deviated from my plan in such a huge way I'd give myself permission to eat my favorite foods for the rest of the day and start over tomorrow.  I stopped off at the grocery store on the way home and hunted around for something tasty, but nothing looked good - not even the gourmet cupcakes!  I honestly felt full and didn't really have a desire to continue eating now that I felt calm and relaxed, so I picked up some veggies and fruit for the rest of the week, treated myself to some tulips and left the store.  I hopped on the treadmill for my scheduled Couch-to-5K workout (6 minutes running, 24 minutes walking) and that was that!  I'm still not hungry for dinner because I had pizza so late in the afternoon, so I'm done eating for the day.  The scale might be up a half pound or so tomorrow morning but that's OK - the important thing is that I've regained my composure and didn't use today as an excuse to go off the rails and eat everything in sight.  I'm choosing to look at today as a success rather than a failure!

As a reward for my behavior this evening, I allowed myself to go 'shopping' in some bins of clothes that are too small.  I found a leather jacket and a cute cotton spring jacket that haven't fit since 2006 - I can just get into them right now and in 5 more pounds they'll fit perfectly.  A nice end to the day!

Yeah!

Remember that half-pound I was hoping to lose while I was away last week?  Well it finally showed up on the scale this morning and it brought a friend...I am officially down a pound from 8 days ago AND squarely in the 230's now.  Life is good.

Welcome Back, Mojo

My mojo is back!  I managed to reset myself today, by eating nutrionally balanced meals (lots of fruit & veg, lean meats, healthy fats), setting up some healthy meals for the week, watching last week's BL and getting to the gym for an awesome treadmill session.  For dinner I made myself a delicious treat (thanks Rena for the idea) - I cooked up some ground turkey with chipotle taco seasoning, then spooned it onto some romaine lettuce leaves with fresh salsa from Whole Foods and a couple slices of avocado.  Yu-huh-hum!  Unfortunately, this combo was so good that it was long gone before I remembered to take a picture.  But trust me, it was delish!

Tonight's treadmill workout felt so great - I'm up to 6 minutes running/24 walking in the Couch-to-5K program and I did my minutes tonight in two 3-minute intervals at 5mph.  I could have done more - and I REALLY wanted to - but I'm trying to stick to the program and trust the process.  Rather than add more time/mileage, next week is a holding pattern - three more workouts of 6 run/24 walk.  My goal is to be running at least 4, if not 6 minutes straight through by the end of this week.  Then I'll drop back to the 2-minute intervals when the time goes up to 8 minutes and see how it goes. I've had some trouble with my right Achilles tendon over the past few months and if I injure it again I'll be seriously heartbroken - so easy does it with each jump up in run time on this program until I see if my ankle and calf are up to it.

I've got a couple fun weeknight activities planned over the next few days - tomorrow night is a 2-hour 'plan your summer garden' class at Temple.  Can't wait for that!  I have vague ideas of what I'd like my garden to look like, but honestly I haven't the faintest clue how to get started so I'm hoping this class will give me some good ideas.  On Thursday evening I have an info session for the SheRox Triathlon, where we'll learn about the event and meet other participants.  The session is being held at a local running store and I'm hoping there will be coupons for $$ off running shoes!

OK folks, time to get ready for bed and get my head in the game for a busy week ahead.  Talk to you soon!

Mojo Gone Missing

Well I'm back from the UK but have done nothing but sleep, eat and lay around the house since I arrived!  I was hoping to be down a half-pound on Saturday morning but I was up 3 instead.  I'm inclined to think it's water retention from traveling, as my shoes and rings are tight.  I'll give it a couple days and get back on the scale.  Today I'm up early and feeling somewhat energetic so I'll be back to my routine in no time.

Rude American Steals Treadmill

Hello!  Many apologies for my long absence - the end of last week was simply crazy and I am out of town this week on business yet again.  This time I'm in London where the weather is sunny for a change.  Best of all, I have been sticking to my planned exercise schedule!  Yesterday I managed a short strength training session before work and this morning I hit the hotel treadmill (more about that in a minute).  Tomorrow I'm planning to do strength in the morning & yoga in the evening, and Friday will be another treadmill run before I catch a plane back to Philly.  I'm hoping to fit in a bonus walk somewhere but only if time allows.

I flew over Sunday night, slept on the plane and arrived Monday morning.  Went right to work and by 6pm  I was pretty tired so I had dinner at the hotel and went to bed right afterwards.  Tuesday morning I woke up early to exercise.  The hotel didn't have a gym and it was still dark outside, so I worked out in my room.  After warming up by power walking the halls and doing a few flights of stairs, I did a 20-minute routine using body weight as resistance - push ups, lunges, wall sits, crunches, etc.  Last night I transferred to a different hotel and planned to get up early this morning to hit the treadmill. 

The hotel guide stated that the gym would be open at 6am, so I left my room at 5:55 intending to beat the rush.  Alas, everyone else in the hotel had the same idea and by the time I got there all the treadmills were taken.  Disappointed, I weighed my options.  Run outside?  No - still dark and the hotel is right outside Heathrow, I'm unsure of the neighborhood.  Run up and down the halls?  No - there are fire doors about every 50 feet on each floor - I'll spend more time opening doors than running.  Skip my workout?  Hell NO!  I got up, got dressed and got down here - I'm ready to go.  OK, last options - use a different machine, or stand around and wait until a treadmill is free.  I chose to make the most of my time and hopped on an elliptical. 

More and more people arrived and soon every machine was taken.  I was watching the 4 treadmills in front of me like a hawk - ready to jump off my machine at the slightest sign of a cooldown.  The elliptical is a good workout but I get really bored on it after about 10 minutes and I really had my heart set on the treadmill.  Watching....watching....that lady is slowing down....YES!  She's picking up her towel.....crap.  Just taking a moment to check her heart rate.  Wait....that guy on the end is definitely doing a cool down....he's taking out his headphones....

Before anyone else could make a move, I pounced.  I was off that elliptical and behind that treadmill faster than you can say 'rude American'.  Much to the dismay of everyone else I claimed the treadmill for myself and jumped right into my intervals.  I could feel the frustration of a couple other people who had been waiting out the same guy - and as I looked in the mirror I could see a woman behind me staring open-mouthed in annoyance. 

The polite, don't-make-waves, don't-draw-attention-to-yourself side of me felt a twinge of guilt before I made my move.  I knew other people were waiting.  But as I looked around the room, I knew that I needed that treadmill more than anyone else there.  Rude or not, nothing was going to stand in the way of my training plan and I decided to absolve myself of guilt right then and there.  I did what I needed to do!  In fact, this morning's workout was all the sweeter because I fought for it. 

As for my eating strategy, I only have one business dinner to worry about - tonight I'll be eating with my team in Windsor (yes, that Windsor - right next to the castle) which has lots of lovely restaurants.  There will be pints of beer and probably some amazing curry.  To pre-compensate I've been eating small meals and not snacking. My hope is that I'll see at least a half-pound loss on the scale when I get back - I'm within striking distance of the 230's!

I probably won't post too much for the rest of this week but I'll leave you with some exciting news I got last Friday.  I went to the doctor for my annual physical and review of bloodwork.  It's been just over a year since I was last there and my cholesterol has gone from 225 to 201, my triglycerides have gone from 166 to 88, my resting pulse has dropped from 84 to 64 and my blood pressure has dropped to 110/70-ish.  My thyroid levels are stabilized (I went on synthetic thyroid hormone about 2 years ago) and my blood sugar was normal (diabetes runs in my family so I get that checked every year).  My doctor was so pleased and of course also congratulated me on my weight loss.  Woohoo!  It's not often that my annual checkup yields anything other than a reminder to eat less and exercise more, yada yada yada.

She did notice that my vitamin D levels were extremely low - possibly due to working all day in an office with no windows - and instructed me to take D3 supplements or get at least 15 minutes a day of direct sunlight on my face and arms.  Yet another reason to get that lunchtime walk in!

Oh, one last thing - the new Jillian Michaels show starts on June 1: http://www.thefutoncritic.com/news.aspx?id=20100316nbc01

That's all I have today - I'll be back to my regular schedule on Saturday - enjoy your week!

You Spin Me Right Round

It's official, I am in love with my new cycling shoes.  Took them for a spin (ahem) tonight at Twisters.  They totally rock and now I will be shopping for coordinating geeky cycling gear.

And (pat, pat, pat) I got BOTH workouts in today - I hit the gym up before work with Terri as planned, for a grand total of 90 minutes of cardio today.  I'm tired - time to hit the showers and cozy up to watch Biggest Loser.

Training Calendar

Over the past couple weeks I've started to get a bit concerned that my triathlon training is not progressing fast enough.  With the event coming up in less than 5 months I don't have any time to mess around.   I think part of the reason I've been so haphazard about my training is that I haven't developed a schedule to follow - I have two strength training workouts plus a yoga class booked with Rena every week but that's about it.  As a result, my cardio workouts have been sporadic at best.

However, last Tuesday I started doing the conservative version of the Couch-to-5K program (I started on month 2 as the first month was for people that needed to work up to walking 30 minutes).  I completed the entire first week with no problem - having a schedule with things to check off was very motivating!  After giving it some thought, I decided to apply that concept to my overall fitness program and the result was this:

 

This is my new workout calendar - two months at a time, color coded by workout.  When March is over I'll move April up and outline May's training on the bottom.  On the bulletin board side I have the overall couch-to-5K program, some stretches and a couple 'homework' assignments from Rena.  I plan to put some motivational quotes there as well.

Here's a closeup of the calendar:

Right now I've got 3 runs, 2 swims, 3 strength, 1 yoga and 1 cycle scheduled in, plus one rest day.  Eventually I'll add another cycling workout but I think this is enough for now!!!  Actually, I'm not too sure I can keep up this schedule but I decided to shoot for the stars and adjust as needed - there will be no guilt if I'm just too tired from the day before.

This was so much fun to put together!  I wrote in my workouts from last week too, to remind myself of how much exercise I got.  The next challenge is to get both of tomorrow's workouts completed - I'm planning to meet Terri at 5:30am for a treadmill workout and then I'm going to Ken's spinning class after work.  Phew, I'm tired just thinking about it...I better make sure I've got everything packed up tonight or I'll never make it to the gym on time...

How Many Calories in a Slice of Humble Pie?

This week I accomplished a LOT in the gym!  Since Monday, I've done:

• 3 strength workouts
• 1 yoga class
• 3 treadmill workouts (days 1-3 of the Couch-to-5K program)
• 1 spin class
• 1 900-yard-long swim (that's a half-mile!)

This is a vast improvement over past weeks where I've really slacked off on the cardio on weekends.  This week seemed a bit easier - even with a lot of social and work commitments I managed to get all my planned workouts in by telling myself to stop whining about a lack of motivation and JUST DO IT already!  Turns out I can go a bit Jillian on myself if I need to.  This week included two work-related dinners out as well as a group lunch so I didn't lose any weight, but at least my workouts kept things from getting out of hand.  

My calories might have been a bit lower this week if I hadn't helped myself to a huge slice of humble pie yesterday.  Right before spin class my husband suggested I try his cycling shoes: 

Some of you might remember my opinion of cycling shoes - I believe my exact words were "I'm not wearing those stupid shoes until Kate Spade comes out with a line of cycling gear."  Normally I wouldn't have agreed to try them - I'm usually as stubborn as a mule when someone offers me unsolicited advice - but he asked me before I'd had any caffeine and I decided to give them a try.   They were a couple sizes too big but I thought I could still make them work for one class.

OMG, what a difference a pair of shoes can make!  It was so much easier to ride - no more adjusting my foot position, no more numb toes, and I got much more power out of each stroke.  Ugly or not, the shoes were a godsend and I decided within about 15 minutes that I needed my own pair.  Immediately.  I washed my humble pie down with a cup of coffee and admitted that I was wrong - now where can I get some of those shoes? 

We had a busy afternoon planned but tacked on a visit to Performance Bike in North Wales at the end of the day.  Ken was more than happy to tag along so he could shop for gadgets while I tried on  shoes.  After arriving at the store he gave me a quick orientation and some suggestions on things to look for and I started pulling boxes off the shelves.  The store was having a huge clearance event and ugly or not, I love shopping for shoes on sale so I soon had a huge pile to try on.  

After a few minutes I figured out my size (42 - sounds huge but basically it's the European equivalent of 9.5) and narrowed it down to a couple choices that fit my requirements: mountain bike shoes (easier to walk in), ski-boot-style buckle on the top strap (instead of velcro), and most importantly, less ugly than the other shoes.  Unfortunately, my first choice was out of stock in my size, and I didn't want to buy my second choice without seeing if the first one was a better fit.  We asked the front desk if they could call the other stores in the area - lo and behold, the Paoli store had one last pair in my size!  They put the shoes on hold for me and we headed off to get them before the store closed for the night.  Paoli is a 25-mile drive from North Wales so we hopped on the turnpike and turned on a Jillian Michaels podcast for entertainment.  This sparked a discussion about shoulder position during plank pose and next thing I knew we were driving past our exit...at which time the GPS informed us that we had just added 30 miles onto our drive.  Grrrr.  Stupid ugly half-price shoes.  

We eventually got there, and I tried on the shoes and decided to buy them.  Honestly, they're not THAT bad:

 

At least they are a pretty color.  I can't wait to try them out - Ken is teaching a spin class at Twisters on Tuesday night and I'm planning to go - I'll report back and let you know how it went!

Organic Lawn Care

My monthly iecycle article has been posted - this month's topic is organic lawn care.  Check it out here: http://tinyurl.com/yfvx2nl.

Keep Calm and Carry On

This afternoon I was trying to think of one sentence that sums up my weight loss efforts over the past few months, as well as my general attitude towards health and fitness. The first thing that popped into my head was a British poster from WWII: Keep Calm and Carry On.  This is one of a series of posters produced in 1939 by the Ministry of Information - the ever-practical Brits planned to use them to remind citizens to keep their wits about them in the event of a Nazi invasion.

I just love the simplicity of this statement - to me it says "OK Jill, this (doughnut, injury, forgotten gym bag, fill-in-the-blank) might not have been in your plan, but you're an intelligent, capable woman - pull yourself together and figure out how to manage your way through it."

I may never have to deal with a Nazi invasion, but anyone that has struggled with their weight knows that sometimes dieting  does feel like a battlefield.  To me, Keep Calm and Carry On seems like the perfect response to any diet challenge.  Box of Thin Mints by your office printer?  Use a printer on a different floor.  Overindulged at lunch?  Have a tiny dinner.  Injury to your Achilles tendon?  Work out in the pool.  I like this slogan so much I'm going to order a poster to put up next to my treadmill!

What statement best defines your fitness attitude?

I Could Use A Cheerleader

Feeling a little annoyed and disgusted with myself today - I have not worked out since Thursday morning!  On Friday I thought to myself "I'll take a rest day" and I went to the bookstore to write (and get away from the refrigerator).  No problem - I had all weekend to get in some killer workouts.  On Saturday I started a treadmill workout, but then the phone rang and I just never got back on.  I had afternoon and evening plans with a friend and just I puttered around the house organizing things and reading my new HTML book until it was time to go - wasting two perfectly good hours doing things that could have been done any other time.  I got home around 8 and used the "it's too close to bedtime" excuse (one of my all-time favorites).  Today was my chance to redeem myself and at least get one workout in for the weekend, but instead I spent my time at Starbucks working through my HTML book & shopping for fitness equipment (kettle bells, dumbbell rack, hula hoop).  Anyone else find it ironic that I procrastinated working out today by shopping for workout gear? Sigh.

I guess it was better than sitting in front of the TV all day - I can honestly say I didn't turn the TV on once (of course, the night is still young).  But I still spent a lot of time sitting on my butt - and I'm sure if I added up all the 2-minute increments of playing Mob Wars on Facebook here and there I could have found time for a workout and still gotten all my organizing, shopping and reading done.  The day didn't get away from me - I let it get away.

I'm not sure why I struggle so much on the weekends to get my workouts in.  Sometimes I feel resentful of the time - like the weekend should be me time and I should get to do exactly what I want at every moment.  Logically I know that working out is the best kind of me time there is, but the teenager inside me disagrees.  I don't have any trouble keeping my appointments with Rena - in fact I really look forward to that time - so perhaps it's the social aspect that keeps me motivated?  It might be time to seek out some weekend exercise buddies.  I also have a hard time getting myself started working out, but once I'm in the moment I have no problem continuing.  It's just getting over the hump of starting and sticking with it for 10 minutes that's a challenge.  Argghh, why can't this be easier?

OK, I'm done whining and punishing myself - tomorrow is a new day, a new week and a chance to be the change I want to see in myself.  Rah Rah!

Goal Check

Now that 2010 is almost 2 months old, I thought it might be a good time to check in on the goals I set for myself late last year:

1. Complete a triathlon: I'm signed up for the Danskin SheRox Triathlon in Philly on August 1, 2010.  Training is underway.
2. Take a class in HTML or web design: Sigh.  I was signed up for an all-day HTML class yesterday.  I was really looking forward to this class and purposely chose one that occurred during my vacation week so I could attend.  Alas, Temple cancelled all classes yesterday due to the snow (wimps), and rescheduled the class for next Wednesday.  Grrrr!  I have to go back to work on Monday so there's no way I can make the new date unless I call in sick (which I seriously considered, but the guilt got the best of me).  In an effort to keep the momentum going, however, I decided to look at the selection of HTML books at Barnes & Noble yesterday and found one that looks easy enough for a newbie like me to understand.  So in lieu of a class I will be using my new book to teach myself HTML, XHTML and CSS!  I did my first lesson last night and enjoyed it very much.
3. Develop a reasonable 2 to 4-year plan for transitioning out of my current career and into one that I love: Ah, my new career plan.  Well, I am pleased to say that I've done a lot of thinking over the past week and I think I have a direction and the beginnings of a 4-year plan (you can't see the twinkle in my eye, but it's there).  I'll keep mum on it until I feel more confident, but I ran it by Ken yesterday and he thought it was a good idea!
4. Bake a loaf of french bread from scratch: I took a bread baking class, and made some pizza dough, but that's it.  This mission has yet to be accomplished.
5. Write a magazine article (does not need to be published, just written): So far I've written two posts for an eco-blog called www.iecycle.org (the second will be published on Wednesday).  Not quite a magazine article, but they did require thought and a bit of research so I think I'm moving in the right direction.
6. Find a way to cook eggs that does not completely gross me out:  Eggs, ick.  I'm trying to like them.  The reason I put them on my list is they seem to be a low calorie, high protein breakfast option and there are a million recipes for eggs.  Everyone else likes them, why don't I?  I did have a piece of quiche on my last business trip (not by choice, mind you - it was that or skip lunch entirely) and actually didn't mind it too much.  It was borderline good, although that may have had something to do with the cheese, milk and pie crust.  Which kinda defeats the purpose - quiche is really just pie in disguise.  At Miraval I tried both scrambled tofu and scrambled eggs.  The tofu was OK, but in general I'm not a fan of the stuff (it's the texture).  The eggs were not as gross-tasting as I expected - they actually didn't taste like much at all (not sure what I was expecting, but boiled eggs smell so awful I assumed all eggs would taste exactly like sulfur).  Anyway, I could eat them if I were on a desert island and they were the only thing between me and starvation.  Ken thinks I might like them better if there were some cheese mixed in, so I haven't given up hope.  Perhaps I should give fried or sunny-side-up eggs a try?  I'm open to suggestions! 
7. Keep blogging: So far, so good.
8. Finish off the exercise room so I have a dedicated space for yoga, meditation and working out: The exercise room is ALMOST DONE!  The carpet is in, the paint is on the walls, the TV and treadmill are in position.  I am now in the final stages of organizing and decorating.  I promise to post photos when everything is complete.
9. Plant a small vegetable garden: I planted an mini-indoor herb garden a few weeks ago.  Everything died except the arugula (note to self, seedlings need water - like every day).  I think this one will have to wait until the weather gets warmer.  In preparation, I have been researching organic gardening, rain barrels and composters.
10. Reduce spending and create a budget to allow for significantly more saving - in preparation for a career change:  Hmm.  I have been spending less lately - for example I've been going to the library or Bookswim instead of buying books (my HTML book notwithstanding), and I haven't bought new clothes in quite awhile.  My biggest triumph is changing my $4/day latte habit into a $1.50/day coffee with milk habit.  Not an easy feat!  But if I'm honest with myself I could do a lot better on my overall spending and I think a formal budget is in order.  In order to execute my career-change plan we'll need a healthy savings account!

Overall I've either made progress or given some thought to all of them, and since 2010 isn't even 25% over I think that's right where I should be!  I'll check back in 2 months with another progress report.

Bits and Pieces

Tidying up some bits and pieces this morning!  In no particular order:

Thanks to Jules of Big Girl Bombshell for the Beautiful Blogger Award!  I was so flattered to receive it - right back at ya Jules!  Please check out her blog - there's lots of good food for thought and her new site design looks awesome!

This morning I'm trying to recreate some of the Miraval recipes, specifically the black rice & edamame salad, and the asparagus/proscuitto appetizer.

I used this recipe for the salad, and it came out beautifully.  Not exactly like the Miraval version but pretty close.  Yum!  No need for a recipe to make the appetizer - I just blanched the asparagus and wrapped it up in the proscuitto.  Double yum!

Yesterday I discovered the make-your-own-trail-mix bar at Whole Foods.  I made mine with walnuts, pumpkin seeds, sesame sticks, dates, currants, dried ginger, chocolate chips and m&ms.  Triple yum!

Now I'm off to Barnes & Noble to write my next bog post for iecycle.org - if I stay home to write I'll eat my way from one end of my kitchen to the other.  I'm writing about organic lawn care this time around - hard to imagine taking care of a lawn with all this snow around, but spring will be here before we know it!

Parting Is Such Sweet Sorrow - Final Thoughts On Miraval

My last few hours at Miraval were uneventful - I packed up, had breakfast, picked up my boxed lunch and caught the shuttle to the airport.  On the way there I watched the scenery roll by and reflected on my visit:

This was one of the best vacations I've ever taken.  Everything was just perfect - the food, the accommodations, the scenery, the spa, the lectures - you name it, it was perfect.  But the best part was the focus on fitness - as someone who struggles to fit exercise into her schedule it felt positively decadent to work out several times a day at my leisure.  I also learned that healthy food can be incredibly tasty and I've already requested the Miraval cookbook from the library so I can try out some recipes on my own.

Upon my arrival in Philly I caught the train to the suburbs where Ken met me with a nice warm car.  At home I crawled into bed and slept a deep, satisfying, dreamless slumber.  Thursday morning dawned with sore muscles along with excitement about putting my learnings from Miraval into practice.  I had a geat workout with Rena, dropped into Whole Foods to stock up on my favorite fruits and veggies, then headed off to the mall to pick up a BOSU and a new exercise mat for my workout room.

This morning I was greeted with some great news from the scale - I have officially hit the 20-pound mark, which means my time at Miraval gave me a 1.6 pound loss!  This is especially notable since I didn't count calories during my stay, rather I tried to make good choices and eat according to my body's needs.  The food was so flavorful that I didn't need to eat a lot to feel satisfied, and I was so busy going from class to class that food was low on my priority list.  What a nice change to come home from a vacation weighing less than when I left!

Overall I would recommend Miraval to anyone looking for a relaxing vacation, a jump start to their fitness routine or diet, or even someone just looking for some great spa treatments!  The resort exceeded my (already high) expectations and delivered a memorable experience that I will never forget.  Thanks Miraval - I hope to come back soon!

Walking the Tightrope at Miraval

Day 4 dawned sunny and COLD!  I left my room at 7 to hit up the smoothie bar but by the time I arrived my hands were so cold that all I could think of was coffee.  So I nestled myself in front of the fireplace with some steaming hot coffee and a 50-calorie piece of coffee cake that was absolutely yummy:

While I ate, I contemplated whether it was too cold for my first class of the day, Zen Boot Camp.  I mean, it was cold out there, people - and all I had to protect me from potential frostbite (OK, it wasn't quite THAT cold, but you get the picture) was a thin fleece pullover.  After about 15 minutes of arguing with myself I decided that I was using the cold as an excuse not to try something new (and likely physically demanding) and got my butt back outside and down to the gym.

Randy was our trainer for the day, and even he looked a bit daunted by the cold!  But we all grabbed our towels and water bottles and set out for the warmup.  On the way, Randy explained that Boot Camp would be just what we expected - tough challenges and a great workout.  However, the Zen part of the workout meant that he expected us to be 100% in the moment with every move - not comparing ourselves to others or worrying about when the timer would go off.  He suggested we breathe through the exercises and allow ourselves to observe the sensations (mostly pain).  With that said, the workout began.  We started by running stairs to warm up, then we did squats.  Not up-and-down squats though - we held the position for 15 seconds, then 30, then 45, then 60.  Each time, Randy encouraged us to make small changes in our position (lean a bit forward on your feet, then back on your heels) to explore how that changed the sensations and perhaps to allow us to hold the position a bit longer.  It was a lot like yoga!  After the squats, we jogged off to the tennis courts for suicides:

These were tough but also strangely fulfilling - racing from line to line I was completely focused and really enjoying the feeling of pushing myself harder than normal.  After the suicides we headed back to the steps for pushups and a few other exercises:

After 45 minutes I was wiped out and felt great!  Quick shower then off to Mindful Eating for breakfast.

The mindful eating experience was interesting - Junelle talked a bit about the concept and then we practiced eating in total silence for several minutes.  I found myself much more connected to my food and really thinking about how it tasted and felt in my mouth.  It was definitely a good exercise!

After breakfast I decided to brave the cold and do some laps in the pool to take advantage of the sunshine and the amazing view of the mountains.  Keeping Susan's tips from our coaching session in mind, I swam about 600 yards of drills.

It felt great and I could feel definite improvements in my breathing technique.  After that I sank gratefully into the hot tub to warm up before my next class:

Barre class was next on the agenda, and this was another tough one.  We used chairs for support while doing a variety of movements with our legs.  Every muscle from my hips to my knees was shaking and weak after this class!  Signe was a great instructor and kept us laughing throughout the half hour.

 

Yet another shower and off to lunch!  The special today was sesame crusted chicken with a wasabi kick:

Yum!

After lunch I attended a lecture on Balanced Nutrition.  Junelle was our teacher and she spoke a lot about the importance of eating unprocessed foods - that Americans are essentially outsourcing their digestion by eating heavily refined foods (such as bread made with bleached white flour), because the body doesn't have to work too hard to store these foods as fats - they are easily broken down in the digestive tract into glucose.  I found this incredibly interesting and it made complete and total sense to me. 

After the lecture, I had a few moments to gather my thoughts and contemplate the next activity: the Desert Tightrope.  This is one of the Dares that takes place on the challenge course, and it involves climbing a pole to a thin cable suspended 35 feet in the air.  Using vertical ropes hanging from a higher cable, you slowly inch your way across to the other side.  Of course, the entire activity takes place in a harness, but this didn't really diminish my anxiety too much.  There are a lot of Dares to choose from - some involve jumping off a 40 foot platform, others involve swinging 35 feet in the air, but for some reason this one really appealed to me.   I knew that the hardest part (at least mentally) would be climbing that pole - I am deathly afraid of ladders! 

Connor showed up right on time to lead Dana, Alex, Rod, Linda and me down to the challenge course, where he explained what would be happening that day.  We each talked a bit about our expectations for the day and then it was into the harnesses.  They weren't pretty, but as they were going to be the only thing standing between me and a broken leg I wasn't really complaining!  We got some final tips on how we would get down, a suggestion to climb with our legs rather than our arms, a reminder to breath through the fear and his blessing to come back to earth at any time during the exercise.  Then it was go time.

I ascended the ladder without too much trouble - having the bolle line attached to my back was comforting (although it kept banging into my helmet at first which was kind of distracting).  

 

At the top of the ladder I panicked a bit, but remembered to breath and took my first step onto the pole.  There were large metal staples to use for hand and footholds, but when I grabbed the first one I realized they were much farther apart than they looked from the ground.  Another mini-panic attack started to manifest, and I stopped it by breathing and trying to relax.  I started to climb.  

A couple steps in and I realized that this would be much tougher than it looked - I felt weak from my two hard workouts in the morning and combined with the panic that I was barely keeping under control my legs were shaking uncontrollably.  I stopped and hugged the pole.

 

Crap, I thought.  I'm barely off the ladder and I can't go any further.  I've been thinking about this moment all week, planning for success and here I am not even able to make it to the stupid cable!  I breathed, hugged the pole and remembered that I had counted the staples while I was on the ground and there were 20 of them to go until I could step out onto the cable.  I can do 20 of anything, right?  OK Shrinking Jill, just breathe...breathe...just do one more step.  That's it, you can do this...your legs are shaking but you won't fall, you're in this nice safe harness...one more step...one more...God this is hard...one more...

Then I was almost to the cable:

And then suddenly I was stepping out over thin air:

As I started to let go of the pole, Connor yelled up to me "Take a moment to breathe and enjoy the view!"  I did just that, and could feel myself relax.  It was much easier to be on the cable than climbing the pole!  After gathering myself, I began to inch slowly to the right - holding on to the nearest staple with my left hand, blindly groping around for the closest rope with my right.  I caught the rope and began to let go of the pole.  Oh boy, that's when things got REALLY hard.  It took all my strength to keep my feet on the cable and my body upright - I was swaying back and forth, my knees were buckling, every muscle in my body was trembling...but somehow I managed to keep moving until I was just holding onto the first rope - about 4 feet away from the pole.  At that point I felt like my muscles were almost at the point of failure - I was swaying and shaking - but amazingly I wasn't that scared anymore.  

 

I told myself I could come down as soon as I made it to the next rope.  Slowly, inch by inch, I kept going.  I looked to my right and saw the next rope and grabbed just in time to avoid pitching backwards off the cable. 

 

At that point I decided I was done and yelled down to Connor that I was ready to come down.  I worked myself another foot to the right so I was directly under the second rope and sat back in the harness. 

Connor slowly lowered me to the ground and it was over.  This was a very physical challenge and I was very weak and shaky...but also very proud.  A year ago I wouldn't have been able to get up that pole at all - I would have made it a few steps past the ladder and given up.  It felt so good to face that fear and win!

Each of us had varying degrees of success - two people made it completely across, one person made it about two thirds of the way up the pole and asked to be let down, and one person made it about two thirds of the way before he lost his footing and slipped off.  Overall this was a truly amazing experience, the highlight of my trip, and I'm hoping to come back next year and give it another go!  

After the challenge was over, I headed back to my room for some R&R.  It was warm enough to sit on the patio so I sipped a cup of tea and enjoyed the view of snow on the mountains:

After that I trotted up to Evening Meditation, but not before stopping off in the lounge from some asparagus wrapped in prosciutto!  YUM!

The meditation took place in the yoga center, and Natasha had comfy backrests set up for all of us:

We meditated on the chakras, starting with Muladhara and working our way up to Sahasrara.  Natasha helped us focus our attention on by talking about each one in turn - its location, its purpose, and its sound.  As she finished speaking about each one she made the sound and we joined in - each one resonated through our bodies and when the sound stopped we enjoyed a reverent silence before moving on to the next one.  She finished by using glass bowls to generate a wonderful resonating tone.  The entire experience was amazing and I felt great afterwards.

I met two new friends, Jean and Carol, for dinner and we enjoyed a delicious meal with lots of great conversation.  I had grass-fed beef bruschetta as an appetizer and elk as my main - both were delish!

 

I enjoyed a glass of champagne with my meal and topped it off with the chocolate fondue (only 210 calories) which was simply heavenly!  At 9pm I returned for dinner and fell into bed for my last night in my casita.

This morning I woke up extremely sore all over, a reminder of my accomplishment on the tightrope!  What a great end to a great vacation.  Right now I need to head up to the lobby to catch my ride to the airport and wave goodbye to Miraval - tomorrow I'll post some final thoughts on my stay!